Knit Lit

Our country is filling up with overracting babies

So, apparently the good e-mail gene has been passed to my brother.

SCHOOL — 1958 vs. 2008

Jim goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school parking lot with
shotgun in gun rack.

1958 – Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jim’s shotgun, goes to his
car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.

2008 – School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jim hauled off to jail
and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized
students and teachers.

Sean and Mark get into a fist fight after school.

1958 – Crowd gathers. Sean wins. Mark and Sean shake hands and end up

2008 – Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Mark and Sean. Charge
them with assault, both expelled even though Mark started it.

Bob won’t be still in class, disrupts other students.

1958 – Bob sent to office and given a good paddling by the Principal.
Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.

2008 – Bob given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for
ADD. School gets extra money from state because Bob has a disability.

Chris breaks a window in his neighbor’s car and his Dad gives him a
whipping with his belt.

1958 – Chris is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to
college, and becomes a successful businessman.

2008 – Chris’s dad is arrested for child abuse. Chris removed to foster
care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Chris’s sister that she
remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Chris’s mom has
affair with psychologist.

Phil gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.

1958 – Phil shares aspirin with Principal out on the smoking dock.

2008 – Police called, Phil expelled from school for drug violations. Car
searched for drugs and weapons.

Pedro fails high school English.

1958 – Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.

2008 – Pedro’s cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear
nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for
graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system
and Pedro’s English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro
given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot
speak English.

Geoff takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a
model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed.

1958 – Ants die.

2008 – BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Geoff charged with domestic
terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home,
computers confiscated, Geoff’s Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never
allowed to fly again.

Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is
found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.

1958 – In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.

2008 – Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She
faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny under goes 5 years of therapy.


February 24, 2010 - Posted by | Random


  1. SO TRUE! SO TRUE!!! I wonder what my 2 broken wrist obtained at recess in the 5th grade would have been worth in today’s world? To quote you….La Sigh!

    Comment by Mom (Better known as Nana) | February 25, 2010

  2. Sad, isn’t it?

    Comment by Bubblesknits | February 25, 2010

  3. Instead of disciplining them, these children can’t/don’t behave in public and they terrorize everyone else. Yesterday at work 3 small children ran around the store screaming and fighting with each other, while the 4th took a plastic ball and played basketball all over the store. ARGHH
    We were pinched and taken to the car and told of the upcoming beating that would begin the moment we got home. From then on it only took a stern look and we would shut up and behave. My mom is a small person, but her she had the strongest and fastest hands when it came to spanking. I still remember the beatings.

    Comment by suzanne | February 26, 2010

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